The happy old man thread...

by **Dale White** » Sat Jun 23, 2012 9:25 am

OWETB wrote:Today I have received news that I have passed my L6 diploma

Taken fucking ages and the final word count was just shy of 105000 of the cunts, yes that is one hundred and five thousand fucking words

how many times did you use cunt :mrgreen:

by **OWETB** » Sun Jun 24, 2012 8:42 am

OWETB wrote:It is a level 6 on the curriculum (even though it is called L5) although someone I know recons it is at L7, I'll chase that up on Monday.

I found this and it does seem to suggest that it is indeed a L7. Unsure what the bottom table levies it at mind.

by **AndyPaul** » Sun Jun 24, 2012 8:57 am

OWETB wrote:
OWETB wrote:It is a level 6 on the curriculum (even though it is called L5) although someone I know recons it is at L7, I'll chase that up on Monday.

I found this and it does seem to suggest that it is indeed a L7. Unsure what the bottom table levies it at mind.

Excuse my ignorance. What do you actually do? (I'm under the impression you are bit like the Health and Safety man?) and what will this qualification help you do? I'm guessing it will enable you to swing your dick around a bit more in your area of work? Well fucking done whatever.

by **eric olthwaite** » Sun Jun 24, 2012 10:27 am

AndyPaul wrote: what will this qualification help you do?

He can now locate his own arse with both hands :salute:

by **the eggman** » Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:15 pm

OWETB wrote:Today I have received news that I have passed my L6 diploma

Taken fucking ages and the final word count was just shy of 105000 of the cunts, yes that is one hundred and five thousand fucking words

an example of quantity v quality perhaps.
Only fucking joking. Well done :-)

by **the eggman** » Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:37 pm

OWETB wrote:Taken fucking ages and the final word count was just shy of 105000 of the cunts, yes that is one hundred and five thousand fucking words

oooh, look at her.

---
I am here: http://tapatalk.com/map.php?lbkl1r

by **OWETB** » Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:54 pm

by **simplyleedsutd** » Mon Jun 25, 2012 6:43 pm

Ponte wrote:simplyleedsutd, never mind, eh.

by **eric olthwaite** » Sun Jul 08, 2012 7:46 pm

Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

by **Ontolly** » Sun Jul 08, 2012 8:07 pm

eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

Before I congratulate you can I just check - the tree was the "bastard" that you hacked to bits :shock:

by **eric olthwaite** » Sun Jul 08, 2012 8:21 pm

Ontolly wrote:
eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

Before I congratulate you can I just check - the tree was the "bastard" that you hacked to bits

Yep, we're all good here now :lol:

Actually, second enjoyable moment of the day:

Mrs started cooking a chilli for us tea, and then realised we were out of chilli powder. So I nipped up the corner shop, asked the (Asian) bloke if he had chilli powder and he found it and said, 'Use it cautiously, yeah? It's quite hot'. I genuinely forget to tell her this when I got back, but I'm out in the back yard and I just heard, 'SHIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!' from the kitchen.

She'd tried it; turns out it was definitely fairly hot :mrgreen:

by **Beer Pig** » Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:17 pm

eric olthwaite wrote:
Ontolly wrote:
eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

Before I congratulate you can I just check - the tree was the "bastard" that you hacked to bits

Yep, we're all good here now

Actually, second enjoyable moment of the day:

Mrs started cooking a chilli for us tea, and then realised we were out of chilli powder. So I nipped up the corner shop, asked the (Asian) bloke if he had chilli powder and he found it and said, 'Use it cautiously, yeah? It's quite hot'. I genuinely forget to tell her this when I got back, but I'm out in the back yard and I just heard, 'SHIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!' from the kitchen.

She'd tried it; turns out it was definitely fairly hot

How was the chilli

by **Man Called Sun** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 8:39 am

eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

I'm struggling to define Mrs O's position in all this. Did she shit all over your car?

by **eric olthwaite** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 8:55 am

Beer Pig wrote: How was the chilli

Mrs sieved the meat out the sauce, and stuck a load more tomatoes in without adding any more chilli, and it still had a right kick. I'll have the rest tonight; probably be OK by then.

Be saving this chilli powder for carefully selected, er, 'victims' I reckon.

by **eric olthwaite** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:03 am

Man Called Sun wrote:
eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

I'm struggling to define Mrs O's position in all this. Did she shit all over your car?

Conceivably, I guess she could have climbed out the bedroom window into the tree at night to shit on the car, but it seems like an awful lot of effort - she usually seems able to wind me up without putting that much into it. Bit worried about what she's been eating if it was her.

by **Dale White** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:10 am

You gotta be careful when you chop a tree down even if it's on your own land, some local councils insist they have a look at the tree before you chop it down, ours is one of them. You might get your collar felt Eric if some local zealot saw you. :mrgreen:

by **Ponte** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:22 am

Ontolly wrote:
eric olthwaite wrote:Major row with Mrs O this morning.

Went out to the car and it was, again, caked in shit from birds in the tree overhanging the drive.

So I thought, 'Right then', chopped the fucking tree down in the rain, hacked the bastard to bits and took it down the dump.

God, that was satisfying.

Before I congratulate you can I just check - the tree was the "bastard" that you hacked to bits

Ontolly, how fucking dark is your thought process? :shock:

by **mi.mic.mick.mick jones** » Mon Jul 09, 2012 4:45 pm

So...who shat on your' car?

by **AndyPaul** » Wed Jul 11, 2012 10:40 am

Other day I upgrade my sky subscription to HD for a year. 3 months free and £100 of M&S vouchers :thumbl:

I will cancel after a year so really I have got free HD. I know M&S is a controversial subject on here at present but they do good ready meals for when I work nights.

by **OWETB** » Wed Jul 11, 2012 10:46 am

AndyPaul wrote:I know M&S is a controversial subject on here at present but they do good ready meals for when I work nights.

£1.72 for a bottle of water though, robbing cunts :thumbd: